Fallen

      His name wasn't Kunzite anymore - that was, after all, 
merely the name of a stone that he had been named as a 
diguise...and then made to become, in a black mockery of 
his naming.  It was not even his first name from the old 
kingdom.    
      Though he supposed it was accurate enough to call him 
after a stone, it would seem odd to do so, and he had picked 
a useable name - Kanjiro - for calling himself to the common 
people of this time.   It didn't matter.   
      He remembered Kunzite better than the other names.
      The rain was frigid against his skin as he wandered 
through the streets of London, a harsh winter rain that crashed 
down as if the sky were sobbing.
      It was cold enough to kill, if you wandered around in 
nothing but a teashirt and Jeans.    
      Kunzite didn't care.   No matter how cold the rain, it 
could never match the ice that filled the empty void where his 
heart had been.
      The water hid the tears, so he'd have at least some 
dignity.
      How did it happen?  How could he have let it happen?   
So long ago the start, and yet he had only to close his eyes 
to see the beginning again.
      He'd heard her approach from only a few yards, but knew 
who it was that must be approaching the prince, turned around 
and said -
      "It must be hard having a bundle of curiosity for a 
princess."  
      The sun had been bright upon her as she found them, 
he the Winter King, his Prince and her Princess together in 
the arbor of the earth palace.  It had turned her hair into a 
aura of gold light...
      He fetched up against the stone of a bridge and stared 
at the sky as lightning painted the semidark purple in light 
and threw half the world into utter blackness of shadow.
      Venus had stared at him blatantly for a moment, then 
struck her head, berating herself for her rudeness.
      He hadn't minded though.   He was used to the stares 
in that time, the looks that the world gave him for his 
strange coloration and powers.    Freak, they called him, 
and perhaps he was - a man born on no world, but in the 
void itself.   If it were such a vision staring at him, then he 
wouldn't care, whatever the cost, simply to be noticed was 
somehow...desirable.    
      For a man who had made his life duty to his King, 
and then to the prince, desires were precious things, to 
be indulged in only very rarely.    
      He might have been able to let it go, as he did so 
often, wrapping himself in hearts armor, that nothing could 
prevent him from his duty to the prince, but -
      "I'm worried about her."
      Then she spoke...with a voice of experience and 
worry to match his own.    The voice of a soul as burdened 
and worn, and as chained to duty...a voice that could 
understand.   No perfect Lilly, this, but a warrior...
Senshi Venus, an equal, and not just pretty to look at.
      Was it then that he...?
      "One day she will be Queen" - She said, 
      "King of earth" - He'd thought as an echo.
      "Her duty to watch over the earth-"
      "And protect the people."
      Were they so much the same?    His duty to give his 
life and soul for his prince, hers...  It was the same at 
the first ball they were all together at, Princesses and 
Princes all...
      "She won't get hurt by falling in love will she?"  
      Kunzite dammed that question.    
      He knew the answer - and it was little different, 
for the one asking it, or the one asked about.
      The memory of that day was like a chain of razors 
in his heart.  The touch of light, never to be held again.     
Venus had so much concern for the Moon Princess...just as he 
for his prince...But that was the way they were - they were 
the ones who gave everything away, keeping nothing to 
themselves.
      "Is it to late for us, now that we have chosen 
to live this way?"  
	That he remembered asking too, though the saying 
was separated by a lifetime.    It had been to late long 
before that, though, to late before even they had ever 
met, when they had chosen to serve, and not to rule, 
as they could have.
      The darkness had come for him, and no single being 
could stop it...no matter the will.   Any power less than 
infinite could not stop Mettilla from turning their bodies 
to stones - stones which would become dark reflections for 
her pet sorceress - Beryl.   Beryl the puppet queen.  
      He did not even know the sorceress's real name.
      "Every time you are reborn you will be one of my 
four warriors!" The mad queen's words were burned into his 
nightmares.    Living and dying and living and dying and living 
again could not let him free of those memories...nor all the
 ones that went with it, from that other life.
      There had been blood - so much of it.  The other 
warriors had fallen to the blades of the four Kings one 
by one...until they reached the Senshi.    
      And they had fallen, felled by love staying the 
one hand, and treacherous magic forcing the other.    Only 
Venus remained.   He wept without tears as he fought and 
watched - watching Beryl strike down Endymion...watching as 
Venus tore the silver sword from her princess in grief and 
rage to strike down Beryl...
      "Princess!  Prince!"  It had been his love's scream 
for what was lost when the child of the bright moon drove her 
own guardsword through her chest, and it still echoed in his 
ears.   The sound of it should have shattered stone, but did not.
      She had come for him then...he alone, they both knew, 
might match her, of the kings.  The others fell like wheat 
before her...she was so perfect.   The memory was enough to kill.
      Blood.   Staining her - and him, as they fell on 
the steps, flung apart by their own strength to lay strewn 
across floor like marionettes with the strings cut.  Both 
struck to kill, his hand forced by sorcery...hers by grief and 
duty no less strong.   Neither bothered to block.
      It was only at the end that he was allowed to weep.
      She won't get hurt by falling in love will she?
      Now he was alive again - he and the other three who 
had yet to remember, the cursed kings who had given up their 
kingdoms for the earth prince out of loyalty, given life 
again by their betrayal, however unwilling. 
      And their loves were dead.    That much seemed 
certain - for there was no word of the Senshi to be heard in 
this godforsaken time.   Nothing less than life for life and 
full sacrifice would have had any prayer against the Demon, 
anyway.
      Kunzite lifted his face to the sky and let the 
freezing rain fall into his face as he watched the heavens 
roil with the wind.     
      Rain fell.   He had fallen, and was waiting to catch it.


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